On Monday — after the close — after a big dead-cat-bounce off the post-Greek-election overnight lows, none other than CNBC's Jim Cramer announced to his dwindling audience that "he's calculated that it's actually a remarkably healthy" market ... The Dow is now over 300 points lower, despite his showing investors the "eight signs of a healthy market." However, it is his energetic pitch for the looming Shake Shack (SHAK) IPO on the heels of the "home-run" Box (BOX) IPO (which is now below its release price and down well over 20% from the highs in 3 days) that, we suspect, confirms the utter collapse of his listening or viewing audience (no matter how 'wrong' the surveys are).

As CNBC reported,

Is the market a sick patient right now, or is it healthy enough to invest? Jim Cramer has his own way of taking the pulse of the market, and he's calculated that it's actually remarkably healthy.

The "Mad Money" host defines as healthy market as one that gives investors a chance to participate, and that's just what it is doing. To help spot the opportunities, Cramer listed eight signs of a healthy market.

A few of the signs include merger and acquisition activity, reduction of overseas worries and IPOs doing well, such as Box and the upcoming Shake Shack IPO.

"My only regret is not being even more bullish than I was because Box was a total homerun. That's what happens in a real good market," said the "Mad Money" host.

And the aftermath. An unambiguously unhealthy market?

Home-Run must mean something else for Cramer's "hedge fund"

As Cramer said this morning (seriously he did): "they're not very winning like we are."