Throw good news on a market, and if it fails to rally, get the hell out of Dodge.

That is the ONLY conclusion one can reach in the wake of the blockbuster July Nonfarm Payroll Report of 209,000.

The headline Unemployment Rate reached a new decade low of 4.3%.

Yet the Dow Average managed a rally of only $66.71 on Friday, the feeblest of efforts. And most of THAT was picked up in only the last 15 minutes of trading.

Stocks did rally last week, some 1.2%, and the “DOW 22,000” baseball hats made their ritual appearance.

But they were worn with nervousness, if not despair, absent the passion and ebullience seen with the “DOW 10,000” or “20,000” hats.

To call this the most hated rally in history does a disservice to the word “hate.”

A number of savvy hedge fund friends of mine are now loading the boat with cheap insurance through buying deep out-of-the-money November, 2017 VIX $20 calls.

Buying the Volatility Index (VIX ) at an all time low can’t be a bad idea. Realized 30-day volatility is now lower than just before the 1929 crash.

Whatever tough sledding the market is facing should be over by then, giving players a shot at potential four or five baggers.

Particularly concerning is that Big Tech, the preeminent sector leader for the past year, is starting to roll over and play dead.

This may be the reason why.

Repatriation of foreign cash hordes has been a dominant theme here since November.

Since the largest companies all have money coming out of their ears, most are expected to use repatriated funds to buy back their own stock.

To give you an indication of the extend of this potential buying bonanza, here are the numbers for the top four firms:

*Apple (AAPL)   $246 billion

*Microsoft (MSFT) $106 billion

*Cisco Systems (CSCO) $66 billion

*Alphabet (GOOG) $52 billion

Here is the scary part. Repatriation is no longer a state secret and may already be fully reflected in the above share prices.

Furthermore, if tax reform suffers the fate of health care reform, a reasonable bet, there may not be any repatriation AT ALL!

That would lead to one of the biggest “OOPS” moments of this decade.

Therefore, if you held a fully loaded .38 caliber Smith & Wesson Police Special to my head and ordered me to do a trade, equities would be at the bottom of the list.

Ahead would be selling short the US Treasury bond market (TLT ), the Japanese yen (FXY), the Euro (FXE), and the buying of gold (GLD), silver (SLV), and the Volatility Index (VIX).

Who will lead the downturn if and when it happens? NASDAQ stocks (QQQ).

I am writing this letter to you from the Portland International Airport in Oregon, on the way back from the Mad Hedge Fund Trader Global Strategy Luncheon in Seattle.

Uber drivers all had the same complaints: runaway gentrification and soaring rents and home prices were driving working people out of Portland.

Indeed, Portland has been leading the Case Shiller National Home Price Index for years now, with annual price gains of 10% or better.

So are rampant labor shortages.

Hardly a business was seen without a “NOW HIRING” sign in the window. It’s difficult to believe that the US economy is only eking out a 2% annual growth rate. It must be VERY lopsided growth.

The national opioid and crystal meth epidemics were also sadly in evidence, with homeless encampments populating under every freeway overpass.

An early morning brisk walk around downtown revealed dozens of young men and women passed out and sleeping on street corners.

We still have the tag ends of Q2 earnings coming out this week.

CBS Corp. (CBS) is out on Monday, CVS Health (CVS) on Tuesday, Office Depot (ODP) on Wednesday, Coca Cola (KO) on Thursday, and JC Penny (JCP) on Friday.

On Monday, August 7 at 8:30 AM EST, we will see the Gallup US Consumer Spending, a survey of discretionary spending.

On Tuesday, August 8 at 10:00 AM EST we get the JOLTS Report, a read on private sector job opening, which may hit a new decade low.

On Wednesday, August 9, at 7:00 AM EST MBA Mortgage Applications are published.

At 10:30 AM EST the weekly EIA Petroleum Status Report is out, probably with more awful news. This could be the low of the week for oil traders.

Thursday, August 10 at 8:30 AM we learn the Weekly Jobless Claims. Last week’s number saw a bearish slight tick up.

On Friday, August 11 at 8:30 the Consumer Price Index, which recently has given us barely a flutter.

Wrapping up the week at 1:00 PM is the Baker-Hughes Rig Count, which has been up for most of the last year, boding ill for oil prices. Last week saw a doubling of year earlier rig numbers, and over a year of rises.

As for me, upon landing at San Francisco airport, I shall go to the lowest parking lot floor to retrieve my Tesla Model X SUV, where it has been getting a free charge for the past week.

I’ll then head straight for my lakefront estate at Tahoe where I’ll engage in another week of deep research and insightful thought.

Thanks to the Armageddon magnitude snows last winter, white water rafting on the Truckee River is supposed to be the best ever!

By the way, we only have a few Saturday night dinner tickets left for the Mad Hedge/Top Gun Masterminds Conference at Lake Tahoe on November 3-4. Friday night is SOLD OUT.

Good luck and good trading!